Written by DJ Fuji         Topics: Nightlife

Do you wait in line at the club? It surprises me how many regular club goers wait because they don’t know any better. Sometimes for hours at a time. Club Pure at Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas, for example, has a 4-hour line for those people who can’t afford bottle service and don’t know how the system works. I used to be one of those guys. I remember waiting in line for 3 hours at Body English in 2004. And then 2 hours for Tryst a few years later. Didn’t get into either of them. Now sure, if you live in a small city there’s never a line. But there’s probably also not a club. But for those of us who live in large metropolises, lines and waiting are a regular part of our Friday-and-Saturday-nights.

Except that you don’t have to.

When it comes to being in the field, nothing kills your state more than waiting around for an hour or more trying to get in. And nothing is more of a waste of time than spending 25% or more of your usual 4-hour-night in the line outside.

And for what? To save a few bucks?

My stance is, what is an hour or more of your precious, 2-days-a-week, primetime field training time worth? Is it worth $10 or $20? If not, then you need to re-evaluate your priorities. Waiting in line is a colossal waste of time.

Here’s how to never have to do it again.

The cheap way to do this is to show up a half hour to an hour before the club opens (9:30PM is a safe bet in California) with a bunch of girls and wait around until the club opens. You’ll among be the first in line which should get you a fighting chance of getting in. If you are severely low on cash, this is your best bet. There’s two problems though. First, you still have to wait in line — you’re just getting there earlier to do it. Even after the club opens, you still may find yourself waiting for all the bottle service reservations. And second, unless you’re very popular or very good at pickup (or both)…AND you’re very persuasive, it’s not the easiest thing in the world to get a half dozen hot girls to finish getting dressed and putting on make up in time to get to the club an hour before opening.

Another way to do this is preparation. Find and befriend someone who works the door or has some power within the venue. Don’t be conned into thinking that the ‘promoter’ you met on the plane who promises to ‘put you on the list’ has any sway over things. You’ll need to go much higher up in the chain to get into the higher-end clubs.

But let’s say for the sake of example that you don’t have access to dozens of hot girls, tons of cash, or mob-style connections. Let’s say you’re an average group of 3 guys who just want to get into the club without a ton of hassle or without waiting forever in line. Here’s how to do it.

I’d say in about 90% of clubs and bars (Europe -London especially- may be slightly lower since y’all are cheap bastards and no one tips there), the doormen make the majority of their income on tips. But unlike waitresses and bar tenders, tipping doorman is often frowned upon by management because it tends to promote preferential treatment–and with it–hostility from those who aren’t in the know.

In most major U.S. cities, the tip is the same as the cover charge for the venue. If there’s no cover, $10-20 per guy usually works. This almost always gets you past the line, although it doesn’t necessarily free you from having to pay the cover charge.

In cities like Las Vegas where the club scene and tourism is enormous, bouncers and doormen will tell you how much to tip to get “walked in,” although discretion is still very much appreciated. At some exclusive clubs on busy weekends, a walk-in can run as much as $40 or $50 per head. There are even rare occasions when walk-ins are unavailable and your only other option is to pony up $500/bottle for “bottle service.”

For those unfamiliar with the concept, it’s basically the equivalent of buying celebrity VIP status for the night. You’ll find it mostly in upscale clubs and lounges in larger cities. After taxes and tips, expect to pay $500+ for a bottle of medium-grade vodka or rum. But you’re not really paying for the bottle. You’re paying for the social proof. You’re paying for the status. Bottle service rents you a booth or table behind the red velvet VIP ropes and usually includes no-line entry for at least 3 men per bottle. For heavier drinkers, splitting a bottle with friends isn’t much more expensive than buying 5 drinks at the bar, paying cover, and tipping to get in, and that’s assuming the social proof has no monetary value. Still, I’m generally not a fan of bottle service. Well, let me rephrase that. I’m not a fan of paying for bottle service. I’ll show you guys how to get free bottle service in a future article.

Getting back on track. Now that you know what and where to tip, let’s look at the how and when in step-by-step fashion.

Step 1: Figure out who the doorman is and how many men are in your party. Depending on the city, culture, environment, etc., figure out how much you want to tip. A good general rule for major U.S. cities is: Cover Charge x Number of Men in Group = Tip. The higher-end the venue is, the more you’ll want to add to that and vice versa. If you’re at a brand new, super-exclusive club in Hollywood, $20 ain’t gonna cut it.

Step 2: Fold the bills (as few bills as possible; better to hand him a $100 than five $20 bills) in half length-wise. Then fold them in half again until it makes a nice little rectangle that will fit in a small money clip or in this case, in your palm. Palm the bills in the center of your palm so that you can’t see them from the other side. You can use your thumb to keep them there.

Step 3: Walk up to the doorman as if you know him (don’t bother with the line, just walk to the front). “Hey man, how’s it going?” If you know his name, even better. Put your hand out to shake his hand. When he shakes, he’ll feel the bills in your palm. Let him know how many guys and girls there are in the group (they should be waiting nearby). Most of the time he’ll smile, greet you, and usher you and your friends in. Sometimes he’ll tell you if you need more (particularly when there’s a lot of guys in your group). If he does, ask how much and tell him you’ll be right back. Go palm the new amount in a discreet location and repeat the process. Every once in a while you’ll run into a new guy or a venue that just doesn’t take tips. In that case either try with a different doorman or pick a new venue (or buy a bottle).

Step 4: Once you get in, get the doorman’s name and give him yours. Sometimes I buy him a drink later on in the night too. Write his name down in your phone or somewhere so that you will remember it later.

Notes:

-If you’re law enforcement (especially local law enforcement), military, or an industry person, let them know in advance, especially if your group isn’t particularly guy-heavy. Show your ID and ask the doorman if he’ll take care of you. It’s still a good idea to tip him at least periodically if you frequent that venue.

-If you’re on a tight budget and you want to bargain with the doorman, you can sometimes get away with a lesser tip, although this is better for being in foreign cities where it’s less important to establish a good reputation with the staff. Approach the doorman and discreetly ask what it will take to get (describe your group, e.g., “four guys, 1 girl”) in past the line. He’ll probably say something like “$100 should do it.” You can try to bargain by saying “I only have $80 on me, will that do it?” Like anything else, it’s a gamble and you may piss him off, but I’ve done it successfully in the past. Just remember that if you’re going to be a regular at this particular venue, you don’t want to come off as cheap to the guy who will potentially be your future hook up guy.

-In my experience, female staff tend to take tips/bribes much less than their male counterparts.

-In huge cities like vegas, sometimes you can’t even get to the doorman because he’s surrounded by a wall of people trying to talk their way in. If you can’t get to the front, look for other bouncers or security guys hanging around the area. Talk to them and see what you can do. A lot of times they’ll be able to walk you through. I once had a security guy get my friend and I in via the backdoor staff elevator for free… because I asked. Of course I tipped him and got his name.

This is how you own the nightlife in your city..

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